This morning I was standing in line and two women in front of me were discussing population size. One was concerned that she didn’t know the population of a certain place. She said “I need to find out right now!” and busied herself looking it up on her phone. It hit me in that moment (as it has in many similar moments) that I am not a real adult.
I have never wondered at the population size of any town or place. I have never wondered what the elevation is of a specific area. I realize I’m supposed to care about these things and somehow once I hit 30 I assumed all that interest would just occur. It hasn’t.
Often I will ask people things about moving to a new town or some such. They will answer with information that makes me somewhat confused. I don’t care about stocks, buyouts, percentage raises, etc – at least not for others. Maybe I don’t think it’s really my business. I’m not sure why, but I feel odd that people are giving me that information. The only time I really feel like I should be listening is when someone is discussing my pay grade, my stock and and my health benefits. (Even that sometimes is a force of sheer will). I guess what I expect to get is the reason they moved. “I got a new job” or “My wife’s family lives there so we moved”. Really, that’s as much detail as I expect to receive.
So, today it occurred to me that I must be a child. I do not expect adult responses to my questions. I don’t think about adult subjects (unless forced). I generally don’t care about the political view of each person in a group unless they are specifically trying to hurt me or those I love. (I love the way my friend said it yesterday “Try and see Christ first, politics second. There are Christians who are democrats and republicans. Christ is in all His people.”) I don’t want to know the details of any medical issue. I’d rather know how I can help someone specifically. I am not a doctor or a nurse so the details are lost on me.
I keep thinking things like “When I grow up…” and think of all the things I’ll care about and be interested in. But, until then – I’m just me.